Evening 7/8: I had my first alcohol-related test and failed, but just a little. My youngest kids and I are staying at a hotel with a pool, just for fun tonight. The hotel restaurant is a sports bar. It was a little too tempting, and I ordered a 22 oz beer. But then I drank about 8 oz of it and began feeling yucky and I stopped drinking it. So not too bad. I was able to stop. I'm still shooting for no alcohol consumption, and will keep working at it, choice by choice. Another benefit...think of all those calories I won't be taking in by avoiding glass after glass of wine every night!
Evening 7/9: Failed to abstain my second night as well. But at least I kept track of my alcohol consumption, rather than drinking from a bottomless wine glass all night long. I also paid attention to how I felt when I drank. The two light beers I had in the early evening made me only the tiniest bit buzzed, and gave me a headache. Throat started hurting 1/2 way into first beer, but kept going anyway. Late in the evening, after the kids were in bed, I sat down to watch a movie and had two glasses of red wine. The trigger to drink in the evening is so strong, but at least I am keeping track and drinking less. I won't stop trying to kick the booze.
Evening 7/10: This is hard! Husband asked if I wanted to have wine with dinner and I said yes. (He doesn't know I am trying to stop drinking. I know I should tell him, but he was not supportive when I tried to stop smoking, and I don't want to fail at this with him looking on.) I had a glass before dinner, and then two more. It's good at least, that I am paying attention to how much I'm drinking and am able to stop before late evening, and switch to tea. I'll keep trying.
Afternoon 7/11: We went to a beer garden for lunch and I drank only water. Good choice!
Evening 7/18: Still having about 3 drinks per night, and want to reduce that, but still don't seem to have enough willpower once evening rolls around. But have not reverted to the bottomless wine glass. Am finishing one drink before starting another, so can keep track of exactly what I am drinking. Also starting to drink later in the evening and switching from alcohol to hot tea earlier at end of night.
Any more updates on my struggle to quit drinking will be posted as tweets, in the Big Fat Bipolar Tweets section of the sidebar.
- Level of Mania (on scale of 1 - 10, with 1=none, 10=practically levitating): 1
- Level of Depression (on a scale of 1 - 10, with 1=none, 10=can't get out of bed): 0
- Medication Compliance (0 = not taking, 5=taking some, 10=taking all): 10
This blog is for informational purposes only, it is not intended to be used for the treatment of mental illness. If you are having emotional troubles, please see a mental health professional, not a computer.